After a difficult week one of our members , Louise , wrote this: –
“Just going to leave this here because I know many of you are, or have been, in this situation:
A brain which has been severely traumatised in childhood can end up wired up very differently to that of other children.
Having a brain which is wired up differently gives someone an entirely different way of interpreting and responding to the world.
When the world of education, health and other key professionals starts from the presumption that all children and young people (and indeed the adults these children go on to become) have a brain which starts from the premise that they are safe, have their needs met and are “ok” as people, total misreading and misunderstanding of circumstances occurs.
This leads to children and young people being penalised for things which are in fact irrefutable needs and to those with the understanding, often adoptive and foster families, being hounded for, at best, having outlandish ideas, and for at worst being in the wrong.
Developing brains are shaped by their experiences and when these are traumatic the brain is in effect damaged.
Until the world of professionals can develop some kind of widespread common understanding of this, rather than in small pockets, those with brains traumatised in childhood and those who seek to advocate for them, stand up for them and parent them will continue to be penalised, undermined, demoralised and to experience self doubt in the face of unjustified criticism.
Sometimes as a professional you have to step outside the box, be open minded, look beyond what you know or think you know and see something you may not have expected to see.”
If you are an adoptive parent and would like to join our group please visit our membership page